In My Next Life, I Want To Be A Bear

In this life I'm a woman. In the next life I'd like to be a bear.
When you're a bear you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that! Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.
I could deal with that, too!

When you're a girl bear, you birth your children, (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake up to partially grown, cute cuddle cubs. I could definitely deal with that! If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business.You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too.
I could deal with that!

If you're a bear, your mate EXPECTS you to wake up growling. He EXPECTS that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.
YUP.......GONNA BE A BEAR!

I wish I knew who wrote this, I found it on a Relief Society newsletter a few years ago, and loved it, especially because Jared's nick name for me is "bear". Thought you would enjoy it too.